Beyond the Veil!

What comes after the wedding bells cease to ring and the bride and groom are thrust together with no frills in between? The first obstacle is the sexual encounter. While most Western couples would be sexually acquainted with each other, the Eastern couples’ first sexual encounter happens on the wedding night that had already been preceded by a couple of hectic days of preparation and a marathon wedding day. The man is overly eager to introduce the blushing bride to the carnal delights while the bride is full of apprehension and misgivings.

Few women have been reported to have fully enjoyed their wedding night. In fact, most women wherever they may come from rarely get the sexual satisfaction from such an experience the first time. The female genitalia is a complex system that needs to become accustomed to sexual intimacy. The invasive nature of the act creates a psychological and physiological shock to the hemostasis of women even if they had fully relished it. Some men are resentful of this because they see it as an insult to their virility and sexual prowess.

At the risk of sounding cliché, it’s us, not you men. Things used to be much worse when women were forbidden to even become intimate with their own bodies. Western women often become acquainted with their erogenous zones and they help their partners explore them. Eastern women are taught to be ashamed of their bodies and dissociate from them, so even if they have needs, they are too often unable to express them. They are also psychologically trained to block out their sexual aspect to keep their chastity intact. It is illogical for them to suddenly dissociate from all of that and simply transition into the role of sexual recipient just because a piece of paper states it is now socially acceptable to do so.

The first few weeks of the marriage will be full of confusing and often contradictory messages that might create a rift between the two if they cannot communicate properly. Even if you have known each other for years, being married creates a whole new dynamics that necessitate a whole new reintroduction.